It might be hard to talk to your partner about getting tested for sexually transmitted diseases (STDs), but it’s important. Chances are your partner will be glad you brought it up.

Talk before you have sex.

You can say:

  • “Let’s get tested before we have sex. That way we can look out for each other.”
  • “Many people who have an STD don’t know it. Why take a chance when we can know for sure?”

There are other things you may want to talk to your partner about. For example:

  • Sexual history — like what type of protection you usually use (for example, condoms or dental dams) or the last time you got tested for STDs (including HIV)
  • Risk factors — like whether you’ve had sex without a condom or used drugs with needles

Share the facts.

You can say:

  • “Most STDs are easy to treat. And when they’re treated early, STDs are less likely to cause long-term health problems.”
  • “STD tests are quick, simple, and usually painless. For example, rapid HIV tests can provide results from just a swab inside the mouth in only 20 minutes.”
  • “If you want to get tested at home, you can get an HIV home test or self-testing kits for other STDs.”
  • “If you don’t feel comfortable talking about STDs with your regular doctor, you can get tested at a clinic instead.” 

Show that you care.

You can say:

  • “I really care about you. I want to make sure we’re both healthy.”
  • “I’ve been tested for STDs, including HIV. Are you willing to do that, too?”
  • “Let’s get tested together.”

Agree to stay safe.

You can say:

  • “If we’re going to have sex, using condoms is a good way to protect us from STDs. Let’s use condoms every time we have sex.”
  • “We can enjoy sex more if we know it’s safe.”